Chapter 1121: Thinking Through

Mu Yangling was right—there was indeed a rift between Mu Shi and Mu Bowen. Otherwise, Mu Bowen would not have looked for Mu Yangling, hoping that his sister would be able to mediate the conflict between the father and son.

However, Mu Shi’s letter directly extinguished Mu Bowen’s enthusiasm.

In the letter, Mu Shi reprimanded Mu Bowen for not being considerate of his older sister. Since she had married into the royal family, she had to be careful with her words and actions, and she must have a lot to do. It was not easy for Mu Yangling to make a trip back, so he shouldn’t let her fret over his matters.

He warned him not to tell Mu Yangling about this.

Mu Bowen could not help but feel sad. He could not tell his mother about this, and it wasn’t ideal for his younger siblings to interfere. If Mu Yangling did not mediate, would he and his father continue to be in a deadlock?

Ever since he was young, Mu Yangling had told him that when a conflict arose between people, it had to be resolved immediately and actively communicated. Otherwise, the longer it took, even small conflicts would turn into big conflicts. It might even become a thorn in one’s heart. No matter if the other party was a stranger or a familiar person, it was not good for things to develop to such an extent.

The former would make the duo become enemies, while the latter would sadden the hearts of those involved.

He was indeed sad now, but when he had a disagreement with his father back then, he wanted to have a good talk with him. However, his father was either too busy with work or quarreled the moment they met. The two of them could never communicate properly. When Bowen finally made up his mind to communicate no matter how difficult it was, his father had left for war.

Now that almost a year had passed, there was almost no communication between the father and son. He could already feel that the conflict between the father and son was snowballing. Hence, Mu Yangling’s return at this time inevitably gave Mu Bowen a sense of support.

Compared to his majestic father and loving mother, Mu Yangling was more like someone guiding his life’s path.

Therefore, when he saw her, Mu Bowen confided in her his troubles without hesitation. Just the night before, he thought that the conflict between him and his father could be resolved this time. However, he didn’t expect his father to be so resistant towards the idea of him resigning and even think of him like this.

Could it be that in his father’s eyes, he was such a selfish person who disregarded his siblings?

Thinking of the harsh words in the letter, Mu Bowen’s eyes stung. Trying his best not to show any abnormalities, he first returned home to bid farewell to his mother before returning to his post.

Mu Yangling worried for two days. In the end, she couldn’t help but write to her father. This time, she didn’t persuade him anymore and only asked him what had happened between him and Bowen.

Mu Yangling felt that since she had only heard Bowen’s side of the story, perhaps her father’s side of the story would be different from what they thought.

Therefore, she should still ask her father to find out his thoughts about this matter.

This time, Mu Yangling did not send the letter via the relay station. Instead, she used a messenger pigeon.

Far away in Taiyuan, Mu Shi had just received the first letter from Mu Yangling. Mu Shi was a little angry at first, but when he saw the date of the letter, he sighed. It seemed that his letter to Bowen was still a step too late.

Mu Shi opened the letter and read it. His eyes were filled with complicated emotions, and he couldn’t help but fall into a daze.

If Ah Ling didn’t mention it, he would almost have forgotten about the past.

After putting down the letter, Mu Shi couldn’t help but knock on the table. He sat on the chair and began to think carefully about everything that had happened over the years.

He did not move even when the sky darkened. The servant who came to light the lamp outside could not help but call out hesitantly, “Master?”

Mu Shi came back to his senses and said in a hoarse voice, “You may leave. There’s no need to light the lamp.”

The servant was about to ask if he should set up the dining table when he saw that there was no more movement inside. Feeling nervous about the atmosphere, he did not dare to ask further and slowly retreated.

In the room, Mu Shi’s eyes were a little moist. His grip on the letter tightened and loosened. In the end, it was because he had been promoted too quickly over the years, bolstering his ambition, and causing him to neglect his family.

It was only then that Mu Shi realized that he was not a good father!

Mu Yangling liked her parents very much in this life because her mother, Shu Wanniang, was a typical kind mother who prioritized her children. Although she was meek, as long as it involved her children, she would rather break than bend like bamboo. Just based on this, Mu Yangling could ignore all her mother’s other shortcomings and was willing to shield her from harm.

Although her father was from the feudal era, he was not arbitrary at all. When she was young, although her father did not necessarily agree with her ideas which sometimes came across as starnge, he would still let her do whatever she wanted. He would also allow her to wear men’s clothes, run to the forest to hunt, and sell prey in the city. He was even more tolerant of her and her younger brother than their mother.

In comparison, her father in her previous life was more like someone from the feudal era, so Mu Yangling was very fond of Mu Shi.

A person’s character would not change easily. At this moment, Mu Shi’s tolerance and self-reflection made him think things through.

In the letter, Mu Yangling talked about their lives and happenings in the past 20 years. This also made Mu Shi start to recall things from 20 years ago until now. By recalling the past, it occurred to him what the problem between him and his son, Bowen, was.

Ultimately, it was his fault.

It was fine before Bowen was five years old. At that time, they lived in Nearhill Village. Although Mu Shi had to go into the mountains to hunt or enter the city to sell prey every day, he spent half a day with his son every day. He made toys for him, carried him on his shoulder to play, read and practiced calligraphy with him, and taught him how to conduct oneself.

But after Bowen turned five, ever since they fled to Xingzhou Prefecture and Mu Shi was enlisted in the army, everything had changed. Firstly, he started living in the military camp. In the beginning, he could take a two-day break every month. Later however, when he accepted a mission in the Jin Kingdom, he was away from home for anywhere between three to six months at a time.

Above the age of five, boys were the most mischievous, and it was also the time when children needed to be educated and have a fatherly presence around. However, at that time, the number of times he came home a year could be counted on one hand. Knowing Wanniang’s personality, Mu Shi was aware that Ah Ling was the one who educated Bowen.

It could be said that Ah Ling played the role of a father and older sister in Bowen’s life.

Therefore, although Bowen admired his father, he was still used to discussing things with and confiding in his older sister.

By the time Mu Shi finally settled down and did not have to be away for prolonged periods at a time, his son could already take charge of things at home. Not only was he good at his studies, but he could also handle the farm and nursery matters. Even with all that, Bowen could even take some time out every year to travel. Mu Shi had almost nothing to teach such a sensible son.

Bowen had only consulted Mu Shi for his opinion on two matters. The first was regarding his taking part in the village examination, and the second was regarding his marriage.

However, he had asked him the former hesitatingly, whereas for the latter, Bowen already had a person in mind and was just asking his father to propose marriage to her family on his behalf.

Since he had not bothered much with him for the past 20 years, why should he make decisions for him now?

Mu Shi sighed. Ultimately, it was because he was too ambitious.

He was already a Grade 2B general. Having made a great contribution to the war efforts this time, the decree to promote him to a Grade 2A general was already on the way. In the future, his connections in the army would be inherited by Bosi. In the future, Bosi would be a third-grade assistant commander at the very least. As for Bowen, he had placed in the second tier of the imperial examinations, and with his abilities, achieving the position of a third-rank civil official was well within reach.

With the two brothers taking the military and literary path respectively, as long as there was harmony within the family, it would not be a problem for the Mu family to prosper for a hundred years. It was because of this that he was unwilling to let Bowen resign.

However, when he recalled his life and dreams 20 years ago, his persistence now was like a joke. Back then, didn’t he just want his children to be safe and happy for the rest of their lives?

Alas, what he was doing now was destroying his son’s happiness.

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