Chapter Six

The Raven of the Evening Star

That night Shin stopped by the cabin to visit the convalescents. Everyone was in better spirits and there were even some of them making jokes, except for one. One of them wasn't participating in the merriment.

Elizabeth.

As he went to her bed and asked her how she was, she did something she would never have dared. But it was what she felt. That feeling she had felt when she saw that man had been different. Over the days she had seen many men and women, but he was the only one who gave her that feeling. It didn't matter if others were repulsed by him or if strange things happened, as Mari had said. He reassured her.

She tugged gently at his coat sleeve, but that simple gesture was like as if her life depended on it. It wasn't a tantrum or anything like that. It was simply the same feeling of someone looking for shelter and support.

Shin didn't understand what was going on and thought she was in pain. But he was surprised to hear the words that came out of her mouth.

"No... I do not want to leave…"

He looked at her and still didn't understand, but simply tried to calm her down. She was still not used to her new freedom and had nightmares. A sudden change after two years of captivity in darkness would not be resolved in a few days. Elizabeth looked frightened and he stood by her side for a long time. Just there, in silence. After some minutes she seemed to have fallen asleep as did everyone else.

Slowly he put her down on the bed and began to withdraw, when he felt a tug on his hand and found those lemon eyes looking up at him. She had pretended to fall asleep, but didn't want to let go.

"Do you want me to stay?"

She wasn't sure what face she was making at that moment, but she felt warm and nodded. Shin lay back on the bed and she moved a little to the side to give him room.

Their gazes met.

Shin leaned on his arm, while Elizabeth rested her head against the pillow. Despite the warmth of the room, Elizabeth shivered slightly, though it didn't feel cold. Rather, she had the impression that she was trying to hold on in a world she didn't yet fully understand. For a couple of minutes they just looked at each other.

"You still haven't told me your name," Shin said quietly, making sure not to wake the other rescued people sleeping in the room. "The others have already told us their names. You're the only one left."

Elizabeth lifted her head and stared at him with her lemon-colored eyes. She blinked a couple of times before looking away, not responding.

Shin wasn't surprised. Since rescuing her, she had spoken little to him, and when she did, her words were still a bit awkward and heavy, as if each syllable still cost her. Still, she had made great progress in a few days. But this time it didn't seem to be a question of difficulty in speaking. There was something else.

"You don't want to say it," he asserted, rather than asked. She said nothing. "I don't blame you. If I were in your place, I wouldn't trust anyone either."

She looked at him again, this time curiously.

"Feys have two names," he continued, lowering his voice to a whisper. "One secret, and one that we introduce ourselves to the world with. Mari told you about that, right?" She nodded. "The secret name is power. Don't forget that. When you can speak well, choose a name for yourself. One you can use without fear. And one that only you know. Don't tell anyone. Understood?" She nodded once more. "I'll be close by. If you need anything call the one on guard. If you need me to come, tell him, you can trust the people here." Elizabeth nodded and he ran a hand over her head. "Try to rest now, lass."

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Shin straightened up in bed, but she felt a pang of anxiety in her chest. He was leaving. She didn't want him to leave. Her throat closed up, and she had to make a superhuman effort to get her voice out. It was barely a whisper, but it was enough to stop Shin.

"E-Elizabeth."

Shin stopped mid-step and turned slowly. He looked at her in surprise, as if he hadn't expected her to speak.

She pursed her lips. She wasn't sure why she had said it. Feeling his gaze fixed on her, she looked down, not daring to meet his expression.

"It's a pretty name," Shin finally said, softly.

She shook her head. She moistened her lips and looked up again, this time with a flash of determination.

"Lizbeth."

Shin frowned. "Lizbeth?"

Elizabeth nodded, then touched her chest. "Elizabeth... Lizbeth."

Shin took a moment to understand. A short version of her name. Something of her own, something that belonged not to her past, but to her present.

"So, that's your name."

Lizbeth nodded again, more confident this time.

"It has a nice ring. I like it."

She sketched a small smile and for a few seconds said nothing to him. Then the idea flashed in her mind. A memory she'd had before. A sunset when she had been little, with her parents and other children. They had been waiting for the first stars to appear. A small reddish glow on the horizon following the Sun, which had just closed its eyelids.

Lizbeth smiled a little more. Then she pulled a hand out from under the covers and motioned Shin to come closer.

He did so and she leaned forward and whispered something in his ear.

Shin blinked, confused. He stepped back.

Four short words. One of them, a name.

It took him a second to process it and his body tensed. "That's..." He didn't finish the sentence. His shoulders stiffened. "You shouldn't have told me that."

Lizbeth knew that.

But she had wanted it to be so.

And it was too late now.

She smiled and for the first time in a long time felt a different kind of happiness. "I-I'll use that...n-name as my.... secret name. And ... Lizbeth will be the name I use from now on."

Shin ran a hand through his hair, scratching it somewhat nervously. "Lass. In the future... never reveal that name. Unless it's to someone you really trust. Someone who is the most important person to you."

Lizbeth cocked her head to one side. "I trust... you."

Shin looked down and scratched his nose. "You don't know anything about me."

"You s-saved me."

Shin sighed. "I've been doing it for a long time." Then he leaned over and spoke to her almost in a whisper. "Listen...someone who knows your secret name has power over you. They could make you do whatever they want, depending on how attached you feel to the name. Even if you decide to change it, it takes a while for feys to get used to a change of a secret name."

Lizbeth said nothing. Not because she didn't understand the danger, but because she had already made her decision.

"Be careful from now on."

"If you want... y-you could tell me yours. And w-we'd be even."

"My secret name?" She nodded and Shin pursed his lips slightly. "I'm a little different. I'm accepted as fey. Well... I'm a little different you can say. The name thing I don't think works on me."

"Is Shin y-your real n-name? Your s-secret name?"

Shin looked around the room and shook his head before looking back at her. "Aogami Shin is the identity I took from a friend. He died years ago. He wanted to give me his identity, as I never had a name to make myself known. I've been called many things before I was called Shin."

"But y-you have a.... s-secret name?"

Shin nodded. "I do have one. Rather, it was given to me." Then he looked at her and leaned close and whispered something in her ear.

Lizbeth stared at him for a few seconds in surprise. "Now we're even," Shin said, getting up from the bed.

"What s-means?"

"In English?... Raven."

"M-Mr. Aogami."

"Shin, it's okay. Now rest."

"Shin."

He paused. "Yes?"

Lizbeth gulped. "I-I don't want to leave."

He stared at her. "We're in a war, and we just freed you from a prison."

"B-but there's more... more like me... out there, r-right?"

He nodded. "Sadly many more than we thought. Some, like you, have been taken prisoner. Others are working by mutual agreement. They may even be the ones who are channeling the way to capture the arrivals. Believe me, you will be better off in England. If you want, you may even be able to help with something from there. Don't make hasty decisions. It's only been a week since you escaped from hell."

"Everyone who's-is here... is helping."

"Some of us are veterans. We've seen too much."

"W-would I be in the way, if I s-stay?"

Shin stepped closer and again ran his hand over her head. "I'm not saying you are, Lizbeth. That depends on what you want... and on the commanders. We're at war and we're almost the members of a suicide squad mission. I've seen too many friends die. Wars, whatever side they are on, are justifications for people who know each other very well to send people who don't know each other at all to kill the other. Believe me, I saw this years ago. This is practically a sequel for me."

Lizbeth averted her gaze for a moment. Her hands tightened on the blanket, but when she looked up again, her gaze was determined. "I-I want to help."

Shin looked at her for a long moment. Then he nodded slowly and sighed to whisper to her. "You have three days to think about it. Don't make any hasty decisions."

Lizbeth didn't hesitate. "That's enough."

Shin pursed his lips and sat up. He fixed a bit the blankets and patted her shoulder. "Now rest, Miss Lizbeth. It's late already."

"Lizbeth… just Lizbeth. Or Liz…"

"Ok. Good night, Liz."

She watched him retreat and became engrossed in her thoughts and Shin's warnings.

Those who were there, were there to do their part, trying to keep the war from reaching an inconceivable escalation. But she had done out of an impulse of not wanting to be separated from him. She didn't know what it was that she felt, but she knew there was something so familiar about him that it hurt to think about it. She didn't want to leave. At least not at that moment. She felt a little silly that that was the strong reason, but she really wanted to help the others too.

If she wanted to stay then she would have to do something like everyone else in that place. She knew how to read, she knew languages. Was there anything else she could do to help? In her mind she was searching for answers and without knowing it, sleep overtook her.

She had no idea that the decision she had made would lead to years of conflict.

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