Alex did not belong to an elite order of deliverers. He was a simple pizza delivery boy in a post System world, and on his thirtieth delivery of the shift, his red polo shirt was covered in muck and grime and all manner of city filth. And paint. Vegetable paint. A real bullet would likely tear through his flesh, and he obviously didn't want to test that. What he did want was to get his current delivery over with.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! STOP SHOOTING ME! I'm the pizza guy!" He yelled and [Phantom Stepped] again, phasing through the dozens of paintballs on their way to break against him.

Goggled eyes popped over the blown-up paintball course, followed by multi-coloured barrels. Fingers quickly tapped their triggers. A wall of colourful goo encased in plastic shells flew towards him while Alex spotted his customer grinning at the end of the course.

Chomping a cigar, wearing spotless white linen, with crossed arms and a smug grin, the linen-wearing bastard just had to be his customer. From the voices of the shooters he'd heard, they were children at…a paintball practice session? With that grin, the man must be the coach.

Insane hobby.

"Did you see I got him in the nads?" A twelve-year-old giggled behind the protective blow-up cover.

"I got him in the web of his fingers!" Another evil child cheered.

Just before he received a fresh coat, Alex spun out of the way to hide behind an inflatable paintball barrier, the kind that look like giant soda cans. A hail of paintballs peppered it, smacking and splattering in the hundreds.

It was supposed to be a simple neighbourhood delivery. Three pepperoni and a cheese. In and out and onto the next. So why the hell were they shooting at him?

The linen-wearing man barked. "Free pizza if he's late, kids! Make sure you block him! It's good practice because that boy can run!"

"Oh, what a cheap son of a bitch," Alex groaned and checked how much time was left. "Who wears linen in fall, anyways?"

[Deliver the Pizza to the Customer - Time Remaining - 3:12]

Alex had never been late on a delivery. Not yet at least. The paintballs continued to hit the blockade, and he took a deep breath while trying to figure out how to get to his customer before time ran out. If he could not get walloped by the hundred, that would be lovely too.

He didn't know what would happen if he was forced to fork over free pizza. Would Nina kill him under a mountain of cheese? Maybe Nino would slap his shoulder so hard his spine crumpled?

Ugh, Francesca won't let me hear the end of it.

He could take the paintballs, it just wouldn't be fun. With the [Baked Ziti] buff running, the bullets only stung. He knew that since he'd been hit several dozen times. The hits weren't deadly, but the kids had also aimed at the most painful places. That didn't mean he wanted to get covered head to toe in paintballs.

It had been such a pleasant shift so far. The pasta from Nina had been wholly unnecessary, as not during a single delivery had he feared bodily harm. The tips had racked up, the deliveries just kept coming, and Alex was excited at being back in action. Clearly though, he and Francesca were starting to fall behind with getting customers their pizzas quickly.

He'd vaulted through art installations under the dilapidated Gardiner Highway to deliver a vegie pizza to artists wearing high end Relic jewellery and living out of expensive tents, faux hippie style. A wrapped picture frame was the tip. They'd invited him to their pop-up show later that day, but Alex had made a polite excuse and got the hell out of there. Just as pushy as time share salesmen, that bunch.

Over to the west end to deliver a meat lovers to a record store hidden behind video game store. He'd been googly eyed and snagged a sealed copy of Advanced Boars for the princely sum of two hundred Credits. It was too cool not to buy. Now if he could only find a working console…or maybe a Relic that could play old video games?

With money to spare, and even more tips to sell at Jemin's, Alex was starting to feel the itch of consumerism again. Snu's casual spending had warmed his little capitalist heart to maybe not be such a cheap bastard.

This time…I'll just be smart. I want cool things too.

"Two minutes!" Linen-coach growled.

Another onslaught coated the other side of the inflated plastic tube.

"Enough of this shit!" Alex yelled around the corner, just as a paintball whizzed by his nose. "Or you're going too—"

A paintball shooting by his face slowed mid air and made Alex pause his yell. The globe of pink plastic floated in a tight circle, and rather than continue on its merry way as paintballs should, it sped up in a flash while changing directions. Then, it pinged Alex right in the forehead, stinging like a bee and coating his face in coloured vegetable goop.

"It worked! My Skill worked! I got him around the corner!" A child cheered from their base of operations.

"Again, Johnny!" Linen-coach yelled, and another onslaught began.

"Gahhhh." Alex spit and rubbed his face with his free hand. "That's it! Now you get what's coming to you! I didn't want to do this!"

Alex activated [Illusory Copy] and out popped a haggard looking Brody. He wore a much better fitting red polo shirt and carried some faux pizzas of his own. It was his eyes that looked exhausted. Gone was the perfect specimen, and in his place was a shell of an adonis.

Several paintballs cracked against Brody's neck in the seconds he appeared, and the clone jumped in front of Alex to share his cover. He looked incredulous as he wiped his hand on his neck to find that even the mighty Brody could be hit by children with fantastic aim and endless bullets.

"You alright, buddy?" Alex reached out and placed his hand on Brody's shoulder to give it a squeeze. "Hanging in there?"

"Mmmmm." Brody met his eye and gave him the so-so hand gesture.

"Look, Beepy and Zippy are working on a way to get to you in the unspace. Every time I'm going in there, I'm trying to figure out how I can move around and not be dragged along. But right now, I need you to help me get past these bastards that won't stop shooting me. Just…uh…just don't hurt them or anything. Figured you might like the fun? Or need the exercise? Please?"

"Mmmm?" Brody gave him an evil little smile and peeked around the blockade. Then, with a neck crack, the clone darted away.

"Oh shit!" A gaggle of youngsters yelled as Brody sprinted towards them.

Like a demon, Brody howled like a lunatic down the field and headed right where the children hunkered down and fired. His feet crushed the fallen paint-covered leaves and threw up a cloud of dust. Once the young paintball team gained their composure, they rallied and positioned themselves to fire machine gun style.

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"Fire!!!" The one that hit Alex's forehead yelled.

Hundreds of trigger taps fired over a few seconds, and a torrent of paintballs rushed toward Brody. He yelled like an animal, dark and vile and angry, and even from a distance, Alex could see their faces pale. Rather than dip and dodge around the bullets in style, Brody opted for a different tactic.

He screamed louder, morphing into a blood curdling scream, and Alex swore he sensed a dark aura radiating off him. The children faltered, and the coach's cigar fell from his mouth. When he was within fifteen feet, rather than slow his pace, Brody sped up faster, and before Alex could call out, his clone long jumped while screaming in an animal's yowls and holding a splattered stack of pizza boxes.

"Ahhhhh!" The children tried to yell, but it was too late. Brody had come for them.

His body crashed against their cover like a cannonball, and from the force, the kids using it as cover were launched backwards. They didn't soar so much as get knocked on their asses, firing their paintballs into the afternoon sky. Those that kept their guns, that is.

Alex panicked, as it had all happened so fast, but it appeared that true to his grunt, Brody had not harmed a child.

Brody pivoted his body and side-kicked the blockage out of the way. It flew, and then the only thing standing between the paint covered clone and the linen-coach was a few feet of fallen leaves.

"Mmmmmmmmm." Brody wiped the paint off his face while reaching down for a thrown paintball gun.

Brody leveled the paintball gun right at the coach's nads, but thankfully, rather than fire at will, he turned with raised eyebrows to look at Alex, as if asking 'Shoot?'.

Alex started to sprint towards the pair. "Don't shoot, damnit! He's a customer! A cheap customer, but a customer all the same!"

The clone shrugged and threw down the gun, tapping his foot and staring terrifying calm at the coach. Now the man wore a nervous expression as he looked at not one, but two paint covered pizza boys.

"Damn dude," Alex said as he reached the pair and handed off the delivery to a wide-eyed man. "Pretty bad ass."

Strangely, when Alex handed off the boxes to the coach, Brody's pizza boxes disappeared in a cloud of colour.

[Deliver the Pizza to the Customer – Burbus McGlurbus - Complete]

[Credits: 11,482 -> 11,682]

"Oh hell yeah," He said. "Stack them Credits up."

"Yeah!" A child cheered. "Fearless! I want to be fearless."

"Woah, he's so cool." Another said. "Like that story about the deliverator."

Brody turned to the kids picking themselves up off the ground and threw them a finger gun. Then, he turned to the coach with cold eyes and made a come-here motion.

"Mmmmmm."

"I-I'm sorry. I don't--," The coach started.

"Give him a tip!" A kid with a mohawk helmet said. The others joined in. "Tip! Tip! Tip!"

Gulping, and with the yelling of the kids, the man reached in his pocket, rustled around, and pulled out a whistle. Brody turned it over in his hand, examining it, before shrugging and tossing it to Alex. Without [Investigating] it, Alex pocketed it and faced the coach.

Alex too gave the coach a finger gun. "Pleasure doing business with ya. Nino's pizza is always on time. And kids," He looked at the grouping children. "Enjoy the pizza!"

"YEAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" They all cheered and attacked the whistle-less coach.

He turned in sync with Brody, which got another set of "Ooooohs!" from the kids, and the pair walked off. Alex tried to match the casual, swagging gait of his clone. The whole thing had been badass. On the far end of the field, the espresso portal waited for Alex. Brody looked over and quirked an eyebrow.

"Race?" Alex asked.

Brody smiled slyly and rolled his neck. Somehow, the pair stopped walking at the same time and braced for a race. Alex didn't notice that they didn't need to speak to understand when to start. Then, both of them kicked off at the same time and sprinted for the espresso portal.

The footrace was even for the first ten meters. Quickly though, Brody peeled forward. It didn't matter that Alex's running was such a high level. Somehow, Brody was able to use all of Alex's innate abilities, including running, and match it were perfect form despite being slowly infected with the curse of Mr. Mystical.

Alex was right behind him, and Brody wished he could tell his link to reality that it was the most fun one hundred meters he'd ever had. Just the pair of them sprinting for a portal. Two buds. He didn't want it to end, but sadly, the pair were quick footed, and the portal was fast approaching.

Before he could leap into the espresso portal, Brody skidded to a stop and wiped the sad look on his face. He placed the sly one on instead. Alex didn't deserve to know just how much it sucked to be fed an evil curse and how much it pained him to keep it from overwhelming him. Through their link, he knew his link was trying his best with the resources he had available. Could feel the worry and earnest care pouring out of him.

"Still got me. Maybe one day," Alex tsked and pointed to the portal. "Hey, can you jump in there?"

Brody looked at him and nodded sadly.

"Doesn't make a difference? You sure about that?"

The clone shrugged and kicked dirt.

Alex sighed and clapped him on the shoulder while looking around. "Look, I think we're north of the city. Why don't you just stay here and enjoy the air? How long can you…uh…be here?"

Brody had no concept of what an hour was, so he just shrugged again.

"We're going to have to time that," Alex rubbed his chin. "Stay here. Enjoy the park. Watch some kids munch some pizza. Has to be better than wherever you're being held, right? Tonight, I'm going to pull you out again and we're going to time it. Yeah?"

"Mmmm!" Brody nodded aggressively and then froze as if a thought struck him.

Thinking, and excitedly patting Alex on the shoulder, a tired-eyed Brody tried to explain with hand gestures that Giat and him had spent multiple hours alone in Snu's lair. The pair didn't get very far. Brody couldn't reasonably impersonate Giat, and Alex had no idea what his clone was doing when he kept sucking his finger. Eventually, Brody sighed in frustration and shook his head, waving off the idea.

Alex squinted at him. "Popsicle butt? Popsicle butt!"

Brody shook his head and finally convinced Alex to let it go. After a quick confirmation from Alex that he would chill outside near the paintball field, they said their goodbyes.

Before Alex leapt into the portal, he looked over his shoulder. "I'm going to get you out of there, dude. I don't care what the hell it takes. Beepy and Petal and Zippy and me and Mary are all working it out. You hear me?"

The emotion practically pouring out of Alex almost made Brody genuinely smile. But he was so tired and sick of being subject to a maniacal ghost who fed him cursed fruit and ranted constantly about making it to Paris. Who the hell wants to go to Paris alone? Instead of letting his real emotions show, Brody just nodded and put on a brave face.

"See you tonight." Alex leapt through the portal. Brody enjoyed almost four hours of lying under a giant willow that kept on asking him if he wanted anything. He just wanted some damn peace.

Through the portal and into the unspace Alex went. Instead of being distracted by the miniature dancing pug-like creatures having a rave, or by the most complicated chocolate Rube Goldberg in the universe, or the gorgeous alien sirens that called his name in lacey underwear, Alex ignored it all.

He squeezed every conceivable muscle, magic based or otherwise, and tried to get control of himself in the unspace. [Phantom Step] didn't work. Neither did [Illusory Copy]. [Shiny Snatch] and [Audio Player] were duds as well. Try as he might, each and every Skill in his arsenal was stopped for some reason in the unspace. Yet he still tried.

And even if he wasn't aware of it, he was building a brand-new Skill in his Core from his sheer force of will. It just wasn't ready yet.

Popping back into the kitchen of Nino's, he spotted Nina stacking more pies into boxes with her magic. Francesca was no where to be seen and undoubtably on a delivery of her own. From the front of house, Nino could be heard arguing with someone, or rather, asking them with barely contained anger, 'How the hell do you melt-a vegan cheese?'. The customer apparently had brought their own.

"Aspetta qua," Nina called as she looked seriously at a hunk of garlic. She didn't mention his paintball covered polo. "One minute, and one last delivery for you. Old friend. Good friend."

The garlic peeled and chopped itself rather than face the wrath of Nina.

Alex tossed the whistle onto his loot bag. The thing was stuffed to the brim with goodies, not limited to one wrapped art piece, a whistle, and several jars filled with some green slime that only came up as [Growth Goop].

"Ready?" Nina chimed his a delivery notification as she finished adding uncooked garlic to top of the pizza.

"Hit me." Alex said, awaiting his audience of one to laugh. Nina didn't, opting to smile cheerfully as he received the ping.

[A New Job has been assigned by your Employer - Nino's Pizza]

[Deliver the Pizza to the Customer - Time Remaining - 55:13]

[50 Credit Reward for Completion, along any and all tips from Customers]

[Customer: Fun Master - Lord Loopy Looper of Wonderland]

"See?" Nina said. "Old friend."

"And a Title change. Fun Master? He sounded OK?" Alex asked after the previously traumatized Dungeon Boss.

"See for yourself. Vai vai!" She shooed him.

Alex lofted Lord Loopy's pizza in one hand and leapt back into the portal. It was time to check in on the old Dungeon Boss, and hopefully, this time the rides wouldn't try and kill him.

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