Excerpt from The Profound and Pretty Princess' Ultimate Guide to Cultivation, Captivation, Cuteness, and Carving Your Way to the Top, English Edition (the worst-selling guide in the history of Putijama)

On Rift and Dungeon Breaks

There are three eventual outcomes when a rift or dungeon gets too full on essence: it Tiers up, it becomes a dungeon, or there's no change.

But in all three cases, the same thing happens first: a break.

When a rift breaks, it suddenly spews out around two times the normal number of monsters for a delve of that specific rift – all at the peak strength for the rift – into the real world.

When the rift has larger monsters, the escaped beasts are destructive and dangerous. But at least they are easy to detect and kill – unfortunately often after they've killed people and destroyed things if not contained immediately.

While higher-Tier cultivators can often kill most of the monsters in a break as they materialize – if it's known about beforehand of course – even a Tier 1 rift break can release enough monsters to evade a team of four or five Tier 3s, especially if the monsters are more numerous and quick.

Rift beasts are also attracted to life and have an innate desire to destroy it. That can mean they attack plants and trees but far more often, they seek out humans and animals. How they can detect people, especially larger settlements, is up for great debate.

To prevent a rift break, a team – or the rare solo delver – must delve the rift, killing enough of the rift beasts to drain its essence to a reasonable level. Generating rift rewards also drains some of a rift's essence. One 'drain-down' strategy is to rush to a boss fight – rift bosses usually have three to four times as much essence as any other rift monster – and collect the reward as quickly as possible, usually doing that multiple times.

Unfortunately, rifts have some hidden math – if not an actual intelligence – behind them with a 'goal' of collecting and retaining as much essence as possible. They can detect the Tier of the person delving – though not the sub-Tier – and will only put out a few monsters to people of higher Tiers, especially anyone two or more Tiers higher. The rewards are also heavily impacted – some rifts often only reward a small lump of coal to higher-Tier delvers.

This is also why a higher-Tier delver draining a rift is so slow and takes many delves: few monsters and bad rewards that cost the rift little essence.

Dungeons are similar though slightly more complicated. The number of beasts – and even their variety relative to past delves – can vary more, making them far more unpredictable. They usually disgorge around three to five times the number of monsters of a normal delve. They also often release their monsters in a wider area, as far away from the dungeon entrance as a quarter mile (400m).

Dungeons also collect essence more slowly so breaks are considerably less common. However, the tools used to measure how 'full' on essence a rift is are far less accurate for dungeons, making them slightly more chaotic.

While a common strategy for some rifts is to let them build up on essence to increase the odds of a better reward, doing so with dungeons is illegal in The Kingdom of Verdant Earth. It is allowed – if not advised – in The Monetary Might Kingdom and little is known about how delving works in the Kingdoms across the sea.

An undead rift that's hungry. I need to let them know… but what if it's sentient too, I don't want to condemn it to destruction…

"Hello…" I mentally replied to the sudden presence.

It sent back a cheerful wave.

…That's not what I was expecting.

Then I sensed the hunger again, a deep longing to finally be sated. The feeling almost went beyond the physical.

Feeling an emotion that was not my own was jarring.

Steve took that moment to pound against his glass in the enclosure on my back. I absentmindedly released one of the treat compartments to his happy squeak.

A feeling of excitement and then happiness brushed against my mind.

Dammit, really? Nearly scared me shitless. I might need that rift reward that makes it so you don't poop, ha. It was really Steve? Wait, does that mean the circlet is working? That's fast.

While before I was able to sense major emotions like fear and pain from him, it was never so clear or nuanced, like a newborn's cry that they wanted something suddenly transitioning to words in under two days.

"I'm talking to you!" a voice suddenly sounded in my face, the stench of some salted meat invading my nostrils and even mouth. Gross. Snapping back to reality, I was face-to-face – almost face-in-face – with a gruff-looking man that was rather grumpy. I thought his name was Jeno? My AAI confirmed that I had at least got that part right.

"Something went wrong with my AAI, audio fritzed," I lied. He didn't seem to buy it but got out of my personal space all the same.

While the man was rude, my focus was merely on getting through safely to get paid.

Isekonsultant Tip to Thriving #45: There's no need to match energy with dicks. Ignore them when it doesn't matter. If someone wants to make it an actual issue, don't back down. But petulant children – no matter their actual age – just want to throw a fit.

"As I was saying, we all need to wear these amulets to prevent possession. If someone gets possessed, hit 'em with one of these." Jeno held up a glass vial with a slightly shining clear liquid. "White affinity-treated water. Cleanses most things. But these are expensive and we get a bonus for every one we don't use. I want that bonus."

He stopped to make eye contact with every single person in the group. "I've got my eye on a new enchanted pottery apron and this is the clincher." His part of the group – the team assigned to clear the monsters rather than protect me – all nodded appreciatively.

They handed out gaudy necklaces with massive clear stones covered in intricate etchings. Putting it on, I felt a faint buzz of electricity that went all the way down to my soul.

"Yeah, we don't have a necklace for my bond," I said.

Jeno looked at me confused. "You shouldn't have a pet in here anyway. Not like it's going to do any— what is it Ferati?" He stopped as a woman leaned into his ear and whispered.

"Huh, no shit? Well, if he's part of the actual team, he can wear one as a belt I guess, we'll just have to cinch it. Was wondering why we had an extra." I was surprised but pleased by his immediate acceptance. He indicated to let Steve out of his backpack enclosure and we quickly fashioned the necklace to stay around his middle.

While the little sugar glider wasn't happy about it, I convinced him with promises of food, made far easier through our strengthened link, opening up two of the treat compartments inside to show I would live up to my word.

Thus far, I had to resupply the food pockets in his enclosure after almost every delve.

How is he not growing incredibly fat already?

Finally, fully equipped to face the rift, we were all moving forward, one vial of what was essentially holy water a piece.

The teams were once again specialized to take on the dungeon – my protection team of three had multiple spiritual protection and cleansing skills and one giant woman that looked like she could wrestle a rhinoceros. And win. Easily. Against the corporeal undead of the rift – mostly skeletons and something like zombies – a single bash with her enormous shield felt like it could do the job ten times over.

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The first room was typical for a dungeon, at least according to my limited experience and knowledge: a long and straight room with a large number of enemies that only engaged once you entered a certain zone, thus preventing a horde or wave situation.

Apparently, they aren't so accommodating as to wait in Tier 2 and higher rifts…

There were pockets of three skeletons about every twenty feet (6m) – each group some combination of warriors with a short sword and buckler and archers – that the clear team made incredibly short work of.

Steve could barely see what was happening through the domed window on top of his backpack but still pushed through our link that he wanted one of the bones to try eating. I turned him down to his chagrin but did drop in a cascade of cheese cubes from my bag once the room was clear and we were safe so he quickly forgave me, sending the feeling of a hug to my mind.

The next room featured three colossal skeletons, each with a greatsword and a different movement skill.

The clear team was ready for them, quickly spreading into a formation to take them on, but weren't expecting the two specters. Barely visible, the monsters swooped down silently from above, one going for a possession and the other a claw strike to the chest.

One of the members of my protection team shouted a warning to the clear team then used a skill, obliterating a ghost in a rain of spectral confetti. Ferati – the second in command of the clear team – used an enchantment on her flail, passing the glowing ball through the other incorporeal creature. Rather than it exploding, the would-be translucent assassin fell to the ground writhing like it was in pain before dissipating extremely slowly.

Hearing ghost screams for a full twenty seconds rightfully wasn't on my bucket list.

Within a minute of the sneak attack, the skeletons were also down.

The third room was a puzzle room based on quick and delicate movements by one person at a time, not ideal for the group we were with.

With a resigned shrug, the hulking woman on my protection team cast a skill, then trudged through the room at a sluggish pace, blocking the falling bone axes and swinging logs as best as she could. Upon reaching the far wall, she grabbed a lever making the constantly moving traps disappear into the ceiling.

The variety of rooms was high but the same could not be said for the enemies. It was only some variation of skeleton, ghoulish zombie, or ghost the entire time.

I wonder if Gabby would throw shade at this dungeon about lack of originality.

The dungeon was a long one at twelve enemy rooms with lucky number thirteen holding the boss: a lich.

However, at Tier 1, it only had ten skeletons to command – a Tier 3 dungeon in The Monetary Might Kingdom had a lich that commanded a literal horde, often creating new soldiers from the surviving bones of the skeletons delvers had already slain.

My team stayed by the door and protected against incoming arrows for a few minutes before the archers were all obliterated in a shower of bone chips by the clear team.

The synergy between both sides was enlightening. While the dungeon monsters were clearly weaker on an individual basis, they still fought well in coordination, making it the toughest fight of the delve by far.

The lich didn't contribute much to the fight as its spells were countered by my protection team; once the skeletons fell, it wasn't hard for Jeno and team to destroy. But it certainly was hard to kill. Since a lich's soul was linked to its phylactery, usually a gem of some kind because liches like to be fancy, destroying the monster didn't actually kill it.

By the fifth destruction and sudden reconstitution in a different part of the room, my team and I cautiously joined the search for the soul's hiding place. I felt out spiritually for it but the room was shielded – I could barely even feel my teammates.

Eventually, when the lich was reforming for the eleventh time, I just started doing like my old Dungeons and Dragons group at a hard puzzle: let's just break all the things until we win. I began smashing the crystals in the walls that were providing light to the boss' chamber unlike the torches in every other room.

The incredulous stares of the rest of the delve team turned to admiration. The fifth glowing light sconce was the charm as the gross pile of weathered skin over bones fell to the ground, decomposing immediately into dust.

Gotta admit, Struva really has competent teams. Even Jeno turned out to not be an asshat.

Outside the search for the object that contained the lich's soul, the entire delve had gone off without a hitch. As a group, we took five minute or so breaks at the end of each room to debrief and recuperate but it was all incredibly efficient and smooth sailing.

We headed into the final room with the glowing orb of the dungeon core to collect our rewards. Unlike rifts, dungeons gave rewards to every participant. The eight humans plus one sugar glider could barely fit but we managed, all placing our hands on the glowing greenish orb at about the same time.

***

Steve Carver, Pugilist, Unchallenged and Unrepentant Leader of The Order of the Ever-Consuming Glider, Even Best-er-est Boy

Yucky day? Brain hurt but good?

Steve reflected on how much of the strange electric feelings were going through him in just the last few hours. While the weird current felt good, it also felt bad. And that was confusing.

Shocky stuff, why not good only? Like food! And nice pillow lady!

He moved the small band of metal around on his head: it was shiny and he wanted to look. But his bond said not to take it off and would cut off his food supply when he did.

Food! Food good!

At that moment, his tummy rumbled. Well, his 'not real' tummy as he started to think about it. The place where the 'funny shocky' stuff wanted to go before he directed into the band fixed around his head.

The small sugar glider looked up through the glass dome on his backpack – the lighting had changed after they went through the 'weird kinda shocky thing' in the air again – and pressed the feeling of hunger to his bond. He wasn't sure how well it worked but the feelings – sending and receiving – seemed to be getting crisper, like a far off object was coming into focus.

Like when food flies to catch! Yummy! Oh yeah, want food!

Steve sent a quick blast of his hunger again to his bond, his steed into these strange places with the shocky energy and mean monsters that tried to hurt them.

He felt the man recoil in shock and fear.

Oh no! I did bad? No food?

Tentatively, he felt his bond reaching out through their connection.

"HI!"

Two feelings of relief washed over Steve, first the sense he got through his bond, then his own at not making the man who provided most of the food and the best pets feel bad.

So the sugar glider sent the feeling of hunger again. But nothing happened. Not okay! Steve pounded on the glass of his heavily reinforced backpack.

Steve's bond reached to hit 'the magic food stick', a lever that released treats for Steve to enjoy which sat just outside a viewing window, constantly taunting him that it wasn't under his control.

Yay, yummy meat!

Steve happily chewed on the jerky, making appreciative noises.

Can tell bond I want food! New power! Infinite power, will have all the food!

Then he felt an exasperated sigh mixed with happiness through their shared link.

All the people in the room started trudging forward.

After a long time and with far too few snacks, Steve felt his bond finally relax; there had been a lot of scary things the others killed but his noble steed didn't do much.

Except hit the pretty things at the end.

Still, Steve was proud that the man did his best. Not everyone could be as excellent at fighting as Steve. As he sent that feeling of being proud through their connection, the man opened the backpack, taking him out to put his hand on a glowing green orb. It was oddly familiar.

Steve felt a pulse go through to 'the shocky place', sensing he could ask for anything he wanted and it just might come true.

What do I want?…

***

I was teleported out of the dungeon with an oddly glowing stone in hand. Even though I had only handled the essence stone Ratmir used for testing Steve for a short while, I was sure that's what it was.

But this one felt different. Almost as though it were far more correct in a way.

As I turned to ask Jasna about it, I heard a squeak of pure happiness looking to my left instead: a pile of cheese cubes was raining down on my bond who was cheering with delight, rushing to throw the food into his gullet with abandon.

With an eyeroll and a heavy sigh, I loaded up his backpack with the food and we started the trek to the last rift for the day.

As we arrived, Jasna handed back my most recent rift reward. "It's an essence stone, you were correct. And it has an affinity, which is moderately rare. The only issue is that it's a null affinity essence stone."

"And why is that a problem?" I asked.

"No one wants it. It will hurt to absorb if not damage someone's cultivation. The value is low," she stated like I was slow.

"Exactly. I can pay just a few gold for it and it should be perfect for either Steve or me. I just have to play it right…"

Merita walked over and looked me in the eye, her tiny height only slightly looming over my seated form. "Are you chatting or allocating? Your team said they want to do this last rift with you, yay or nay. We're early and I want an answer now when I can still call off the other teams."

As always, she was all business. Deciding to play nice, I answered with the truth. "You caught us. We are chatting, mostly about my reward. I got an essence stone." Her eyes lit up as I handed it over but the excitement quickly diminished to eventually land on a look of disgust.

At seeing her reaction, I said, "Yup, null affinity essence stone. Can you get a price check, I might want to keep it. But to your other question yes, call the teams off. We've got this one."

She nodded and walked away, presumably sending messages on her AAI.

I started to allocate my overly full spirit once more. As Merita left hearing distance, I whispered to Jasna, "So, I can get a better feeling from Steve as to what he wants. That circlet is pretty amazing. Scared the crap out of me though, thought someone was talking directly into my mind. In the dungeon…" I made a facial gesture to try to indicate I meant our friendly sentient dungeon Gabby.

"Do you have something in your eye? At your Tier, you should be able to will it out or disintegrate it with your eyelids. I prefer to crush the dust or debris for its hubris. I know it's not real but it makes me smile."

Deciding to just let it go, I sighed and waited for my team to show up.

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